Thursday, August 21, 2008 / 9:35 PM
I feel slightly better. But still at the mercy of my VERY unpredictable moods.
ANGRY! mellow.ANGRY!sad.
frustrated with myself.
@_@"
Well, I got my act together for a while today at least. I studied MGEN for abit though I couldn't really get my mind ON it. I seemed more inclined to think about AIMM. lols. Either way, I wasn't 100% on the ball. And this is bad when you're supposed to be having semestral exams in less than a week. 4 days even!
Sometimes, I think I shouldn't be in the science industry. But, I should be grateful for what I am given and that I am this blessed to have this life. I could not possible complain when I have food, shelter, loving (though sometimes abit...*_*) family and good health.
kay', going abit off topic now.
Sometimes, I wish I could have what others have. Like I'm not entirely happy with what I am and what I have. Then I go and waste it all by wishing I had something else. Like I don't like how I look. Well, not fond of it at some times. But it's still my face. haha. But...
I'm glad I have a normal-looking face. Many people are not so blessed and wish...for even a semblance of a normal-looking face.
Thank you God.
(P.S. I'm gonna start my rant now...If you don't wish to spoil my previous moment of thanksgiving...please exit now. Thank you.)
I hate being the eldest. All the pressure is on me to do things. Whatever it is, I will be the first one asked, the first one blamed, the first one to take responsibility. More so, when I am the one who is mostly home nowadays. My sis has declared that she doesn't like to stay at home. It's feels so stifling and my mother always nags at her for coming home late. Which is why she stayed out later in the first place, to escape this. Leaving me at home to deal with things. Telling me this, as if I don't feel the same. All the more I feel so trapped. I don't have a CCA to immerse in, don't have my best friends or any other friends to go out with (not that I don't have best friends and friends...they just don't invite me out...or are going out with other friends). Basically, I don't have anything to look forward to. School. Home. School. Home.
Crap.
They're all leaving me on an abandoned ship that's sinking fast. Buggers. I'm not saying that they're bad people or anything. I'm just saying they have other commitments. I'm a slacker/procrastinator. I have no commitments.
Fine.
Let me putter along my staid life til' I find something.
ANGRY! mellow.ANGRY!sad.
frustrated with myself.
@_@"
Well, I got my act together for a while today at least. I studied MGEN for abit though I couldn't really get my mind ON it. I seemed more inclined to think about AIMM. lols. Either way, I wasn't 100% on the ball. And this is bad when you're supposed to be having semestral exams in less than a week. 4 days even!
Sometimes, I think I shouldn't be in the science industry. But, I should be grateful for what I am given and that I am this blessed to have this life. I could not possible complain when I have food, shelter, loving (though sometimes abit...*_*) family and good health.
kay', going abit off topic now.
Sometimes, I wish I could have what others have. Like I'm not entirely happy with what I am and what I have. Then I go and waste it all by wishing I had something else. Like I don't like how I look. Well, not fond of it at some times. But it's still my face. haha. But...
I'm glad I have a normal-looking face. Many people are not so blessed and wish...for even a semblance of a normal-looking face.
Thank you God.
(P.S. I'm gonna start my rant now...If you don't wish to spoil my previous moment of thanksgiving...please exit now. Thank you.)
I hate being the eldest. All the pressure is on me to do things. Whatever it is, I will be the first one asked, the first one blamed, the first one to take responsibility. More so, when I am the one who is mostly home nowadays. My sis has declared that she doesn't like to stay at home. It's feels so stifling and my mother always nags at her for coming home late. Which is why she stayed out later in the first place, to escape this. Leaving me at home to deal with things. Telling me this, as if I don't feel the same. All the more I feel so trapped. I don't have a CCA to immerse in, don't have my best friends or any other friends to go out with (not that I don't have best friends and friends...they just don't invite me out...or are going out with other friends). Basically, I don't have anything to look forward to. School. Home. School. Home.
Crap.
They're all leaving me on an abandoned ship that's sinking fast. Buggers. I'm not saying that they're bad people or anything. I'm just saying they have other commitments. I'm a slacker/procrastinator. I have no commitments.
Fine.
Let me putter along my staid life til' I find something.
