Freaky. I have just chatted with this unknown person ad this is my 2nd time talking to him. Yes, a him. A 29 years old him. Which is fine with me. Just talking. Then we started discussing about his girl problem. He said later that he had not eaten yet. I say if only we can imagine stuff and it come true, I would wish for money, because we talked about money as well. I wished sweet dreams and goodbye. Then he said...

Him: "Dream of me sleeping beside u."
I said some comment like "Eating a ham sandwich".
Him: "With fork and spoon in my hand".
Me: "Eating a ham sandwich" (cos' I was suspiscious at this point)
Him: "Eating u" (or something like that...)
At my disbelieving "huh?", he said "U as food"...

And then I totally (without obviously showing)...FREAKED OUT!

I was like, whaddehell?! For one thing, he's old and I'm a minor. Another thing, I don't know him. But later he was like, "Later u show this to the police", "I was just joking lah", "Later I find police at my door.". Maybe he was joking. Maybe he was just mildly (emphasize MILDLY) flirting. Or he really is a PERVERT!

I don't want to discuss it anymore. Freaky. But he saw my picture on friendster. Moving on...

I still haven't decided whether to continue until school starts. But I know I will continue until the 15th since if I "resign" now, they will pay me only 1/2 a month's pay. The choice is obvious. But I think I will stop at that. If I want to continue throughout school, I'll have to transfer. Oh, well.

I almost thought Chris had fainted or was unconscious or something. She was "sleeping" in the office on the desk. It didn't look like she was breathing so I called Moet and asked. We were like quietly debating whether she was okay for a while, hovering near. At the moment I was about to put my finger under her nose to check, she woke. WTH?! Scare me to death, lah! After that I burst out laughing with Moet.

Almost full-shift today. From about 9 in the morning to 8 at night. Turns out that Chris wasn't feeling very well and Fatimah called in for MC. Last minute some more. Ah Ma was called in, and obviously wasn't very happy. You could see the stress on her face. And Ah Ma is always stressed so the obviousness was startling. When she asked me to stay until closing, I said yes. If they're short-handed, what was I to do? Refuse? Moet got away scot-free, no need to do extra hours. Hmph. At least I got a break... Well, that wasn't much either. Ate $3.20 dry beef noodle ($2.90 after discount) and mango. Bloody $2 for half a mango. I had chosen already, so I was like "paiseh", cannot refuse... On the plus side, the mango was actually nice and sweet.

I'll be glad when I "resign". The morning commute to work sucks. I can't imagine why people put up with going to work like that. Wait, they have to. hahaha. The drudgery of being crushed and mobbed in the train, shuffling en masse towards the esalators. I actually thought about this blog entry while I was in that drudgery. Although it was more "colourful" and eloquent than now, I guess the intensity of the emotion at that time seemed to bring words forth. hahaha. hahaha. hahahaha. Whatever.

Bone tired. Had planned from yesterday to meet up at Farah's suggestion. Met up with Sharmila first before going on to meet Farah at her workplace. We tricked her that we had went on board the wrong train and she freaked out. We had originally planned to surprise her at her place but to no avail. Tough luck. Went to Orchard Road. Actually, Far East Plaza to be exact. Needless to say, I sum the next hour or more up to shopping, browsing and more shopping. One of the funniest things to happen today was Shar buying underwear at Isrida. Goodness, the amount of kinky apparel in there...Take note of the underwear with specially made "animals" that you can make your penis wear. Like an elephant trunk. Or underwear that were more straps than cloth. You can imagine for yourself. Kinky bastards.

We bought food at Funan. Farah and me ate Taco Bell (It's not like we can eat it everyday...). Shar ate KFC. We brought the food to opposite Clark Quay, beside the Singapore River stretch. The night was serene, the wind was cool. What more could I ask for. Apparently, I got two cam-whores. lolx. So much for be careful what you wish for. Anyways, after we ate, there was like almost 2 hours of cam-whoring as people gawked past as they walked by. Whaddehell? Never see people take pictures before is it? I don't really feel up to blogging right now. What we did was in our memories and that's all that counts.

Or maybe I just don't care for the hustle and bustle of town culture. Vibes. Whatever. Street culture gives me the willies. Give me laid back, no-pretense, no wanting to be up-with-the-crowd life and I'm home. I need to give myself a cleansing break. No offense. I'm just not that kind of girl.

Prezzies! Unexpectedly got a present from Ah Hoon (Sexy). So sweet. I still don't know why she gave it to me. Maybe because I once gave her a present? Or because I'm going? Who knows. I didn't tell anybody why I gave them their presents either. Well, I'm planning on giving something again, because the last time I didn't give Moet and Letecia (At that time I didn't know them that well.). Maybe a cake? Anyways, they've been kind to me. I can't say the same if I had gone somewhere else...

Yahh! On episode 10 already! Which is all there is on Youtube. sigh. Hurry up!!! There are only 3 options now. One: Buy or rent the VCD. Two: Wait until Channel U shows it. Three: Wait until the next one comes out onYoutube. And why are there only 15 episodes? Why? Oh, the agony and the horror!

I think I saw Zubaidah yesterday. An old primary school friend. She appeared to be in ITE Nursing course now. But I must say, she looks not much different. Got a Subway cookie yesterday. Free! Chewy, yummy goodness...

Now on the 9th episode! So addictive! I'll bet by the time this series reaches Channel U, I would have finished it already. hah! Channel U so slow. Oh, well.

I saw one of The Dance Floor judges yesterday at my workplace! The botak one. It's mean, I know. But I forgot his name. I actually talked to him. Cool. Well, nowadays I am so clumsy. I can't do anything without dropping things at least once. I'll be both glad and sad to "resign". Glad not to be holed up there and being clumsy, and sad toleave friends behind. But hey, I'm a creature of change.But when I look at it that way, it's not entirely true. I like routine and familiarity as well as anyone. It's a contradiction but I do thrive when I change my routine so that my life is not so predictable.

Love's addiction has struck again. Now I'm watching Hanazakarino Kimitachihe (Hana Kimi, for short). Love it! So funny. And Quan is so shuai. sigh. On episode 6 now but it takes a long time too load. I just started yesterday night and reached episode 6 in a few hours. Now, now part, note "part", takes like forever to load. Argh! It's killing me. And I just found out it might air on Channel U in Feb. ARGH!!!

Now I'm watching a video on Youtube on how to dance Sexyback from the So You Think You Can Dance routine. It's good. Even a mere beginner like me can do it. Slowly, lah. With two left feet. But I think I got it.

It occurred to me that I am becoming more selfish and, not, at the same time. Both at the very extremes. Well, I really wanna get back to school. I am getting listless and restless...

Good morning Singapore! Yup, another day, one step closer to the D-day.

Yesterday I went to Temasek Poly with my sis and her friends. Why, you ask? Because I have no friends, or rather no life with my friends after "O"s. At first, it was quite awkward but after a while, they warmed up to me. They had planned to go Ngee Ann Poly after TP but since we went there late (due to certain late people...) and we somehow misread the bus route (ending up in Little India instead of Tampines Int. lol), it didn't happen. Well, TP was quite okay if not slightly boring. Though I must say that the campus spirit is quite good...Temasek me...Temasek youuuu....Really, honest to God, they said that. The Engineering students were boisterous. But their presentations lacked. They all wore T-shirts with different colours for the different schools. Oh, and yeah, I saw a lot of guys. God, that sounds despo. Anyway, I saw a few familiar faces like Jazli and Sharmila. Sharmila I saw twice, once at TP, one at Little India. They got lost too.

Afterwards, we go eat at Toa Payoh Fork&Spoon. I go eat Gyo Don or something. Nice. I don't want to explain everything. Too many details. Moving on...

Had a talk with Sya yesterday. Finally, a friend. Some semblance of a life after all. Not much was said but I desperately miss my friends...help.

Today my manager went home early. She had looked very pale, almost white-like. Really horrible. Then, Fatimah told me that she was ill. As in seriously ill. Epilepsy, fits or some other. She had fainted, rather had a fit outside the M1 shop before and had to be taken to the hospital. I hope she's okay.

I am going bald. Well, maybe that was a slight overstatement...But, hey, losing hair everytime you run your hands through it (more than a few strands, mind you.) is not something to be taken lightly. It's damn freaky. Maybe it's because I use a shampoo for coloured hair and a conditioner for dry/damaged hair. Maybe it's because I recently dyed my hair. Maybe it's because I'm stressed. Maybe I wash ad condition my hair too much. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Just as a precaution, I'm not going to comb my hair (If I find anymore hair falling, I'm going to freak.). I'm going to lay off the almost compulsive obsessive ritual of always shampooing and conditioning my hair and massaging my scalp vigorously. Maybe that's the problem. Oh, damn.

This afternoon, at work, I found something disturbing. Empty plastic boxes. Small, empty plastic boxes that used to contain Fasio makeup and now weren't. *gasp* Dare I imagine? Yes, sadly, it is true. Someone had indeed stole the merchandise. whaddehell. I have never encountered such a thing before while working there. How the hell?! Damn it. If I catch anybody, there's gonna be hell to pay.

I am ow so obsessed over my appearance, others' opinions of myself and the like. The usual cocktail of therapy-inducing madness. Well, moving on, now I'm reading a book by Robin McKinley. So far, so good. Very good, in fact. I just borrowed it because I had nothing to read while waiting for Incubus Dreams. The usual remedy of fluffy romance novels did not have their normal appeal. In fact, I'm pretty much bored, not having much to do. Go work, come back. That's it. I can practically feel my IQ disintegrating...As well as my state of mind.

I am a psycho.

It's true. I don't know why. Of course you wouldn't know, would you? Whatever it is, I hope it goes away soon. I can't take it anymore. The people around me, I think, are starting to be wary of me. I feel as if people are looking at me. I know. These are just delusions, right? Heck, I don't know anymore than you do. The sooner I quit my job and start having a "normal" life, the better. The desolation and despodency is mounting up. I just hope I can survive intact, mentally and emotionally. Godhelpme.

I am so crazy...and supremely embarassed. I laughed out loud today. Not a big deal, right? Oh, but it is...If you are at work and someone asked you something which definitely did not deserve a laugh. And the laugh was loud and boisterous. As well as crazy enough. Only afterwards did I realize that I did ot even intend to laugh like that. Or laugh at all. It just came out. I felt like that was somebody else. Or maybe I'm just plain ol' crazy.

The store manager at Junction 8 Watsons is handsome. Okay, don't ask me how and why. It's just a fact. Well, today I was not so "on-the-ball" at work, so to speak. Oh well, to hell with it, I'm going out anyway.

The dance routine to Sexyback on So You Think You Can Dance was so cool. Made me wish I could dance like that. rowr. Well, I think that Donyelle is a role model for voluptuous girls everywhere...oops, in today's bigoted terms it's called fat, or more nicely put "plus-sized". Well, we deserve respect. I mean, adhering to the stick-thin society as the elite is so...wrong. It just is. Ahhhh!...TO HELL WITH IT.

Went out with my mother today to Cosway and ViVoCity at the same time. Nothing much to see anyways. Got to see the Swedish ship Gotheborg at the HarbourFront. Lots of Swedish crew on the ship. And it was damn huge. H-U-G-E, huge. It really looked like a pirate ship. A couple of people were on the huge rigging and masts to do work, I guess. One of them didn't even wear a harness. Oh my God. You could fall from that great height and die. But it was all quite cool actually. Swedish guys. Mmm. Well, there were girls...But I don't really swing that way...

Went to Daiso and bought stuff. Ate at Banquet. Went on our way to the MRT when I saw somebodies. Tom Yam and his girlfriend. I didn't mind actually. It's just that I kind of stopped and stared. Like a idiot. What the hell? Now that's plain stupid. My mother said that he's not so handsome. And she's right. What was I thinking?

Anyways, moving on, looked at the This Fashion sale at Sun Plaza. So cheap now. They lowered the prices considerably since the start of it. I bought a dress which I later found out to be faulty. Oh, well. Couldn't really fit me anyways. My hips are too big. Or is it the media's fault for the rise of the skinny no-boobs, no-butt generation that caused a shocking trend of similarly fitted clothes? "Voluptuous" or should I say curve-inclined people cannot fit into these clothes. I envy my smallest sister. So thin. So many clothes that can fit. And yet, doesn't know how to wear nice outfits. By the way, my mother bought her this blouse and dress that would make a great outfit. We chose it. Frankly, we have more fashion sense than she does, referring to my sister. My mother always asks my opinion on what to buy for my sister cos' she doesn't know how to pick her own clothes.

Yo. Gave in to the impulsive decision to dye my hair. Well, not so impulsive, really, if you count lingering around the hair dye section of my workplace and secretly looking at the dyes every chance I get. I bought the dye just now at NTUC. Revlon ColourSilk in Burgundy. Putit on just before I went to work. Which is why my hair now isn't very burgundy-like. Probably I was rushing and washed it a tad too early. Oh, well. Subtle is as subtle does.

Finally,I am able to get some time to blog. No, it's not that I'm busy or anything. Just preoccupied. Bought a bag from the nearby pasar malam for $23, the same model as my sister's. We also both bought iron-ons to put on our bags. She, a cute yellow duck, and I, a bunny rabbit. A pink one at that. But all looks good, though I must say that the bag is cavernous.

Back to work, again.

The Anita obsession is welling up even now. I have finished Cerulean Sins and now I am hankering for more. MORE, I tell you! Well, the later volumes won't be out soon so I will either have to slow down my reading or to wait until the next one comes out here. Which will be a damn long time. And, my stupid keyboard keys are sticky. Stubborn sticky,ot icky yucky sticky. I keep having to backtrack to correct the things I missed. My description of life now is plod-plod-plod-plod-plod. Plodding on...

I have absolutely no doubt that I am going nuts. Nuts with a capital everything. NUTS. For one thing, I am totally thinking weird thoughts about and around guys. I mean it's really crazy. The only way I can dispel this train of thought is to reassure myself that I am indeed not "appealing" in any sense. It hurt me a bit to think that is true, but hey, life is not all about superficial beauty. I think not being in contact with male friends has made me a "male-o-maniac". Now that's bad. And me blogging about this is even more pathetic. But the last time I checked, this was still my blog...

Yes! My stealth mission has succeeded. Well, partly. I put the "goodies" with the name tags in the respective cubicles. Since I didn't know Chris's one, I just put it outside. Wel, of course this is the part where it wasn't so stealthy. But for the rest, they didn't know. Except for Jowhar, whom I told, and Sexy, who asked Chris and yeah, Chris knew it was me. Well, I would still consider it a resounding success! I practically grinned from ear to ear when I knew they didn't know it was me. It's sort of my style. Pranking, stealth missions and stuff like that...I wonder what I will be up to next.

Pan's Labyrinth is going to be out in Singapore! I wanna watch it. I saw the movie review in an european movie magazine at the library a few months ago. It seemed intriguing and fascinating given its weird (and I'm using this loosely here...) characters as well as its interesting storyline. It's basically about a girl in this strange fantasy world and her experiences in it. Actually, the real plot is more complex and stuff, but figure I'm not up to explaining without quoting from some help from a website. I had a wallpaper of one of the characters on my computer and it freaked my siblings out. I really think the Pale Man is the most freakiest thing I have ever seen. It has all loose skin and no nose, no eyes. To see, it has eyeballs on its palms and it would have to hold the palms face out over where his eyes should be. Just look it up on the Net. I'm sure you're going to have nightmares after that...You have been forewarned.

I already bought the bears that I was going to give my colleagues. I also bought 3 bears with "FRIENDS FOREVER" on them. I figured that the "MISS YOU MUCH" would be nice but maybe I wanted to give them something to remind of our friendship. Then we would all have the same bear. Like a fellowship. Which reminds me of Frodo. lol. I wonder what our quest would be? Burn all the bears in 10 years when our friendship has dissolved? choi ah. touch wood, touch wood...

The time of reckoning nears. chey. But, really, it is. The clock is ticking and soon my results will be out. I don't want to speculate anything. If I say, I can't make it, at least if I fail, I won't be as disappointed as if I had set myself up for a fall by overconfidence. I'd rather not be doing that. Well, all in life is not without some hardship...