I'm back from the dead. haha. I've been to lazy and too sleepy to blog. I've been sleeping to school, back from school and on the dot at 9:30. Really. As soon as its 9:30, I automatically head to the bed and then I lose all sense of consciousness. It's worse than a coma, seriously *_*.

Been through a series of pop quizzes and tests and whatnot. Flashes or borderline passes and failures. OK, everything's a bit fuzzy and sped up so you have to forgive my inaccuracy. And I'm still sleepy. Goodness.

Went home with Farah yesterday. Bought "tehbuih" from the bubble tea shop opp. the bus stop. Nostalgia abound as we reminiscised about the days past. The bus was even non-air conditioned. Balik kampong. lol. On the way to the MRT, saw this busker who was doing a statue-imitation thing. He was wearing a wig, only a "diaper-like" briefs and a body painted silver. No comment. Coincidentally met with Shar who we gave up waiting for. But we still went home together. Laughed and shared some funny times inside the train. Shar still doesn't get the jokes. Okay, I'm shagged, (to borrow Farah's words), can't even think straight. MUST THINK. MUST-*collapse*

I'm kinda glad my eyes aren't puffy anymore and I've lost the urge to cry like an idiot. Yeah, I said IDIOT. Sad, but true. I hate feeling this way. It's pathetic. And it's wrong. This whole thing is wrong for so many reasons. I just don't understand my mom. There, I said it. I was angry at her for so many things. Basically, we had a rousing good fight. I was trying to sympathise with my sister, stand up with her, is that so wrong? I know she treats my sis differently than the rest of us. There is a marked difference. I can see it. You'd have to be super-blind no to. She treats her as though she's not as clever as the rest of us. As if she's not better. My mom has a super laser mouth and it hurts to be on the receiving end. I still remember a time when she said "nasib baik anak aku muka tak lawar, kalau tak dah ade mataair dah". Translated, that says that she was glad her children were ugly cos' then they would not have boyfriends. She said this to her friend. She likes to say a lot of things to her friends. The problem is I always hear what she is talking about. Damn, it hurts.

I still cannot forgive her for this after so long. And she treats my other sister WAY more different. At least, I try and clean up the house. She like, doesn't care at all. No conscience. On the other hand, I have a HUGE one that glares and beeps at me until I do something about it. Damn you. I hate this. Hate it. I hate that I care. I hate that I feel so pathetic thinking about this. HATE. Thinking about other things, this feels so trivial. But it is real to me. I just can't understand. haha. I'm going to escape to school early tomorrow. So I don't do anything stupid.

I've been thinking about this for some time now. We have free will, right? But our life has been preordained by God. Naturally, both in theory, cannot co-exist with each other? But what if, divine preordination states that we have free will? What then? Is our free will preordained, already mapped out?

haha. What do you think of that? Confusing, huh? I can be a philosopher.

Thinking of the "Four Musketeers" reading Farah's blog. The video that I made as a parting gift...Brings back a wave of nostalgia. *grin*. Shoutout to Farah for always being there as a friend. YOU ROCK! I PEBBLE...WE STONING.

Emo posts these past few days. Well, can't really help it. I'm feeling really crazy nowadays. I think blogging keeps me sane. Then, again, I sound like a huge DRAMA QUEEN. Well, welcome to my blog. Feel free to not read it. haha.

No HAP lecture today so got to stay home longer. But I stil went out quite early. Reached there like 10:30. Early, right. And the Biochem lecture started only at 12. Hung out with Joann and Syira. Sharm dropped by awhile, inadvertantly made Jo angry. About who else? Satish, lah. I really don't understand the two of them sometimes. bleh. But then, who am I to say?

OC quiz today. haha. Made so many careless mistakes that I'm sure I'm gonna fail. Tomorrow I have a 2 hour Biochem lecture. *_*. My sentiments exactly. lols.

I think I'm my distrust for strangers is getting the better of me. But really, today was creepy. There was this guy who sat beside me in the bus. Then, after a while he fell asleep. And as he fell asleep, his head went lower and lower. OMG. Nearly reached my shoulder. Inches away. I was already scooting towards the window but I had nowhere to go. Damnit. I was about to make some noise to "wake" him up (cos' I was already screaming in my head...PERVERT!) Then, miraculously, he woke up before he totally closed that inches of distance. pheW. It was like he read my silent thoughts to punch his face. Maybe, I was overreacting. But this was seriously creepy. shudder. I hate people who sleep (or are precariously close to) sleeping on people's shoulders. Unless you are my friend or family, off limits, man. wah lau. Scraed me to death. But I was fuming the whole way. Thinking "WTH?!".

My eyes are not puffy anymore. I don't want to say why. Only that it's about family and personal stuff. Cos' it's all water under the bridge. Well, not yet, but I'll have to do it sometime. I still feel the way I feel. I can't stop the feelings. How I wish I could just take my heart away. Or at least, the emotion part. And for the record, no, I'm not pining over a guy or lost love or whatever romantic shit. This has nothing to do about that. My sis and I had a soulful release of pent-up emotion session. I poured my heart into it. And it still kinda feels raw around the edges, so I'm not going to touch it. Or else, I'll feel worse. I already feel worse.

Met up with Farah today after school. Thought she would have gone home by then cos' I was late. But she was still there and we took 39. 969 queue was too long. On the way, we had a conversation that we hadn't had in ages. We reminiscised, laughed, joked, wondered. Confessed. I actually really confessed that I had a huge confliction of emotions (a.k.a. The Crush). It's a first for me. Since I don't do these kind of things. My other friends, maybe. Me. No. So this was a huge shocker. Well, I'm not sure whether it's just close proximity or admiration. I hope it's not more. I hate it when it becomes complicated. BTW, life sucks.

Today is a bad day. Right from when I came home, everything went south. sigh. My sis failed 4 subjects. Have to see the VP. She went in slowly, say needed to see the VP. My mother asked why. She circled around but then said the matter out straight. Not surprisingly, my mother built up steam and then blew. You know, my mother has a laser for a mouth I tell you. Never get in the way unless you are a fool. It hurts, trust me. I had my fair share of teacher-parent calls and top-blowing incidents. But seriously, it got up to a point where there was a shouting match. sigh.

Somehow, money always comes into the picture somewhere. She nevers says it directly, but I know she wants me to work, I think. Cos' all she ever talks about now is money, money, money. It seems that everything needs money. Double sigh. Wanted to apply for job just now. Didn't. I think I have interview-phobia. I keep making excuses for myself. hahah. And I think I'm becoming more anti-social. I took the 291 bus instead of the 23 at the TP bus stop. Cos' it always seems to be crowded. I can't stand crowds sometimes. Well, most of the time. I have social anxiety. I can't deal with this. On top of that, I have other issues to address. I wish that I could be blase about certain stuff. BGR stuff. And guess what? Shu Min wants a BF. Talked to Shu Min just now. Kinda missed her, never having seen her for so long. But still, I can understand her woes. Same here, buddy. (But not that I want one. I just feel left out of the picture.) Life, huh?

Well, Insya'Allah, I will overcome this. God, I hope I have the strength to be a worthy person. Cos' right now, I feel like shit.

There is a lot of hate in this world. Terrorism, hate, bombings. I wonder how many innocent people get killed this way. The seed of discord is sown everywhere. And I kinda think that America is being such a badass. It wants to control a lot of things. Things that sometimes even they can't control.

Enough of this seriousness, had PIPC lab today. There was no HAP lab. So counted as only 3 hours. But since I went to school early to use the PC lab with the gang, I was there since 11 plus. PIPC was uneventful, really. Did titration and measuring only. Some of the equipment were pretty foreign as they were different from what we were used to, but still. Cool. Anyways, some people got so excited in the lab. For what reason, I do not know. Make such a big noise over every small thing. dotz. End up forking money, lols. Some people were snapping photos as usual. Normal, lah. For us, only. ^_^.

Today, the 969 queue was SUPER de long. haha. Insert singlish. Anyways, the queue was from the 969 berth until McDonalds. Now that is long. I think, could be about 1 and a 1/2 - 2 buses long in length. So I decided to take 39. It would be about the same in travelling time, if I included the wait. Cos I figured that I would have to wait like 4-5 buses before I could get on board and have a seat. Oh well. Slept the whole way (Like I haven't slept enough already...dotz.).

P.S. >> I lost my favourite "habit" (It's my comfort thingy...I know I'm insecure sometimes, get over it.) I want it back. If my mother threw it away, I need it back. I need closure. Childish me. But still, old habits die hard. Hard,I tell you.

Downloaded Granado Espada at last. Wanted to see what all the fuss was about. Especially to check out the eye candy, as well. sigh. Nice graphics, I must say. The art is very well drawn and designed. Damn. I wish they made it keyboard friendly, instead of using the mouse. It's hard to point and click to move. However, I haven't gotten very far in this game. Still lost as to what I'm supposed to do. Well, cheers.

Today, went through HAP and Maths quizzes. Biochem was yesterday. Damn. Going to die for Maths. Couldn't do a single question. Except maybe the last one. That's it. Today was CCN day, a lot of people and booths in a small space. As I would say, very "rimas". How I felt like I could push them aside, it was so frustrating. I don't like people who walk slow, cos' generally I walk quite fast. I'm always like "couldn't they walk any faster?". haha. Impatient. That's me.

Bumped into Farah at the AS toilet outside LT8. Didn't know she was inside. Until she came out and called me. She said that she could recognize my voice from inside. haha. Then, our OLs came bursting in the LTs. For the main-comm elections. Twice. lol. Kept "advertising" themselves.

Met Shikin and Yao Jie at the Semb Int just now. The conversation we had was so random.

Okay, obviously, I have nothing much left to say cos' honestly, I think that blogs are for expressing of your innermost feelings. If not innermost, then, what is on your mind. Pouring out your soul, thoughts, emotions. Blogging about daily life can be so mundane, especially when it's practically the same. Day in. Day out. You know, I actually thought that today was the start of the week instead of the end. Everything zooms by so fast. I even thought that yesterday was Sunday! lols. Never has a week zoomed by like an absolute blur. If this continues, I'll be forty in a month.

Anyways, I can't feel much out of life nowadays. Sometimes, I just wish it had an end or a purpose. I'm not doing this to be "emo" or anything. That's just the way I feel. I hate thinking that there's no meaning. I hate that sometimes I care too much. I hate that I feel so empty. I don't care what you think when in fact, I do. I'm such a paradox, a contradiction to myself. This sucks. See? I can still laugh at myself. At least, that's a good sign...

I tear my heart open.
I sew myself shut.
My weakness is...
That I care too much.
But when scars remind us that the past is real.
I tear my heart open.
Just to feel.

I feel so lost. Life has lost its meaning. Sometimes I find it, and yet, sometimes, like today, it totally eludes me. Poly life is so boring. Day in, day out. Same thing. sigh. And I think I care entirely too much. I am becoming too overwhelmed with feelings. I care what people think, I think too much about guys, I care too much about trivial matters. All this when I should be thinking of living my life to the fullest, to make the most of what God has given me. I fear I am going back to the "brooding" phase again. My old sulk has shown its fugly face today, as I was going home from school. But the feeling comes and goes...

Now, I'm not feeling much saddened. The phase is over, for now. I guess poly just intimidates me. Makes me feel inconsequential and weird in a crowd full of people. haha. Anyways, I somehow always find time to be selfish. Like now.

Had a leg cramp as I was going to Sun Plaza today. I was just walking and suddenly, "bang!". I just stopped, doubled over and tried to massage it out. Damn. Luckily, it wasn't so bad that I couldn't walk afterwards. But it still twinges. Haven't really studied for Maths Stats. Thinking of Granado Espada right now. The beautiful graphics. Awesome costumes. OMG. Baroque period. My favourite era. as well, as Victorian, Regency and Goth. I'm drooling already! This makes me reconsider my decision to be in biomed. I love fashion more. Great. Just what I needed, Muna. Indecision and doubt. You've done well for yourself...

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Finally, the damn Blogger is back to normal. Hooray!

Back to the topic. Today was pretty normal. Met up with Linn first, then cam Zuu to print out the HAP notes. Went to tutorial. blahblahblah. And did I mention, NO Maths? Finished a whole packet of Rabbit sweets and a whole packet of sugar plum sweets. My daily addiction. Everyday, I need to make a trip to the bookshop for my daily "fix" and stock up. haha. Drug addict. Put me in Rehab. Transferred the money for my Vampire Knight uniform accesories. Need money. Need job. Hire me.

Tomorrow there is the Maths and Biochem tests. God. I am still slacking. Well, I think my fate is sealed.

My Vampire Knight uni is arriving at the end of the month. And I am still lusting after this vest. argghhhh. This would fit in with the EGA/kodona/dandy look. Just what I wanted. Damn. Have been debating this for, like what, a month or more? However, the only thing that will be flying out of my pocket (and wallet) are going to be moths...

Sugar rush. Rush, rush, rush. haha. High on sugar already. Ate a whole packet of sugar plum sweet and drank a whole bottle of Pepsi. Now, I'm eating White Rabbit. hehehe. Guess what? I "ponteng" PIPC lecture today. That's a first. We spent the time at Business school, eating the stuff we bought from Cheers. Then, after that, we did a little revison. Essentially slacked, lah.

Then, we went to the fountain area near Mensa canteen, sat on the benches and enjoyed the breeze. Fuuyoh, shiok man.









And these are the pictures from yesterday's lab jaunt. You can tell we were fooling around in there.




Well, today got to go home early. Ate with Linn, Zuu and Nadiah after school. Then went home. Coincidentally, saw Joann, Shar, Kari and Krishna so went home together. Shar was fed up about Law guy. dotz. Then in the bus, she leant on my shoulder and told me about their Saturday make-out (oops...) session. wah lau. I innocent, sia. Okay, basically I have nth much to say. So I'm going to shut up now.

I'm not really up to blogging nowadays, but I think today warrants an entry. haha. Today, met up with Gina, Azlina, Nadiah and Zuraiin for CSAS project. I reached the library pretty early but still most of the rooms were already booked so I went to find some romance novels to read. *luvv* Then, met up with Gina, followed later by Nadiah and Zuraiin. Azlina met us in the PC Lab where we decided "what the heck, let's just wing it!". Long story short, we completed the assignment and printed the thing onto transparency paper. We couldn't use the ones the lecturer gave us though. sheesh. Had to buy our own. Must remember to claim from her.

After that, went to eat at Flavours. I ate Swedish Meatballs with Boiled Butter Potatoes. Mmm. Then went on sweets expedition to the TP Bookshop. Gina is really crazy about White Rabbit milk candy, bought 3 packets. lol. Then came OC lab. Started late, but still managed to go home early. Why? Cos we didn't do one experiment. Just took our neighbours results. Today was on distillation by the way. Using water-acetone mixture. Scary sia. Forgot to put the boiling chips. Then we told the lecturer, and he said that it was very risky. To put the boiling chips now, would have also been very risky as it could splash out. gasp. But he did it anyway. And it really did fizzle. Luckily, it didn't explode. Well, that was the only scary part. The rest was just routine. But still, everybody was like playing around and stuff. My gosh. If we were to use stronger chemicals...

Yet another reminder of my utter stupidity. Remember the modelling agency about a month ago? They said that they would call around mid-April. Look when it is now! And I stupidly paid the fucking deposit. uggh. Heart pain. painnnnn.... Bogus agency. Idiot me. I really need a job. Will someone please hire me?

I feel so emotionally exhausted. So a jumble of feelings I don't even know where to begin. And I think I'm changing for the worse. I dunno anymore. Nowadays, I also feel very sleepy. Even when I have already slept in the bus on the way to and from TP, and at night, when I sleep. When I open my books to study, I always wake up the next morning, finding out that I had slept the night away. Damn. I always feel so guilty nowadays, since I seem to be talking about myself all the time. I'm sure somebody has wanted to slap me sometime. Just to shut me up. And now I changing to be more narcissistic, I guess. I am too busy harping about my own problems that I forget about other people. At least, that's how I think I behave lately. But only, after I have already did the selfish deed, did I realise. I'm such a loser. Damn.

Anyways, today has got to be the most gutsy and fun day for me. As usual, Jo and I had our splurge day. This time at KFC. Mmmm. We shared a buddy meal. Yumyum. We ate like monsters, all over the place. I was more disgusting with my weird eating habits...but still, it was super fun. We ate with no inhibitions. Messy? Messy, lah. Don't care. Just ate like we didn't care what everyone else thinks. Yeah! After that, something happened on our way back to TP. Jeng jeng jeng...We saw LAW guy! The guy whom Sharmila has been raving madly about. haha. And you know what? We asked for his name and number!!! Bold, right? At first, he just walked past us with 2 of his friends. Then, Joann started to shout "Hey, my friend likes you!". OMG. I think they thought that I was the one that liked them. Eww. No way. Too much like Sadiq for my taste. ugh. Then he looked at us but kept walking. We also just walked away. Then I mentioned that Sharm wanted me to ask for his name and number for her. Me and Joann took matters into our own hands and quickly ran back to them. I felt like a stalker, man. Finally, they stopped and we clarified the matter, asking for his name and number. haha. He actually gave it to us. He was damn polite for someone who had just been stalked by 2 rabid stalkers! We even showed Sharm's picture in case he thought we were bluffing. I don't want him to think that WE like him. No. please. After that, we laughed all the way back. What balls we had!

Anyway, I hope I don't think about "stuff" again. It's really distracting me.

P.S.>> If I sound crazy, it means I'm normal.

Too bad you can't really see the shirt. It has a cravat, and frills at the chest as well as the sleeves. Cute, man. The outfit was so EGA. sigh.


Another failed attempt at a photo...

Today, met up with Sharm, Joann and Farah to go to school. We didn't actually go together all at the same time. But we did get to school together. Actually, I'm too lazy to post. So tired and I still need to study. Die ah, die ah. hahaha. Ate thosai today. Almost slept in all the lectures, even my beloved HAP, cos' it was soo boring. Played "daidi" in Flavours with Syira and Kaveen. Waited for Joann and then we went home in 39. Stoning all the way...

Hey, it's me again. Who else would it be? Haven't blogged in a few days. That's a first...since...since...well, since ages. Nothing of much import to say though. Just that I'm more confused than ever. As well as sleepy and stressed. Had a Biochem lab session where we learned how to use the micropipette. And today, applied for job at NTUC at Woodlands 888 Plaza. That's why I was home so late. Tired, man. But today, I was a rocker chic, so I must be tough. Tough it owwwwwwt!!!

Vanity, thy name is woman. Well this time, Vanity's name ain't Woman...it's Muna. haha. Today, I went very casual. Couldn't be bothered what anyone should think of me. I'm adopting that method now. Since, I care entirely too much about what others think of me. I should have a changed mindset. I want a whole new me. For the better, of course. Unless I want to be Luke Skywalker. Turn to the Dark side, suckers. And then I'll have an illicit affair with someone, have a child and wait decades before saying "I am your father...". sheesh. I have a vivid imagination for these kind of things but no brain for studies. Figured as much.

Well, today was the first lab session. HAP. wheehee. Too bad it wasn't SexyLoh. But still, it was fun wearing the lab coats and experiencing the lab for the first time. Although, I couldn't really draw the cells and was a bit blurr about everything. hehe. Later, turns out that there was no PIPC so we went to Flavours to eat. Zuu, me, Linn and Nadia went to "chop" place first as we were the first to arrive. The whole freakin' long table. For the whole class. haha. Then as nobody else came, we wondered why they were so late. We called and found out that they were collecting the goodie TPSU bags.We were soon joined by Fareed and Alex. We waited for quite some time before the rest finally came. But by then, some of the seats were already taken as we thought that not all of them would come, so they had to split. After we ate, the original ones of us who waited, plus AlexZz, Wess, and Faiz went to do homework and group discussion at the library. Not much to say after that, only that the guys finished so fast and left the rest of us behind.

I went home with Farah and Sharm. Took 168. Slept deeply all the way to Woodlands and didn't even notice it. I guess I was too tired out. Doing goodness knows what, I also don't know.

I still haven't finished my homework. Maths is a complete mystery to me, still. The rest is ok. But I have to comment that OC still bores.

and...

HAPPY B'DAY SHARM!!!

I have finished reading the 9 chapters of the manga A Thousand Years of Snow! Aww. I'm a sucker for strong damsels in distress and a cute vampire hero or two. haha. I'm kinda slacking of now, as you can plainly see. I am totally bored and that gives me no motivation to study. Although I have been looking through some PreLectures and Interactive Tutorials on this website I found. It really helped somewhat. Now I understand how hybridisation works and stuff. Better than Ms. Ler. Man, I'm still waiting for my Vampire Knight uniform. Where are you?! I hope they didn't forget me...

I think I'm the cause of my thinning hair and pimply face. Whenever I get stressed or just out of habit, I will absentmindedly poke at the pimples or scratch my head. I won't realise it until either I see a layer of my hair on the ground or blood on my face. Gross, but true. Man, like this, I'll be bald before I leave poly...

post DESTROYED, TORTURED, BURNED & CONSIGNED to the DEPTHS OF HELL due to excessive amounts of degradation to selves and others, narcissism and abject whining, and other forms of healthy teenage behaviour...

really, I'm not kidding...

Don't put me on the shelf
I still have some sense of self
Don't you put me in a box
I won't be bound by your restrictions

Give me time to right this sin
I won't be blamed if you won't let me in
This is one of my addictions
You're the one shaking all my convictions

I fall so far and yet so low
The ache inside
I can't let go
Just breathe in

I never even got the chance to know
What it is that makes me on the fringe
Of all the world
Looking in

I try to hide
But it makes me empty inside
To know that you will never care
The pain I carry is too much to bear
If all I do in life is watch the world pass me by

Can you hear my silent pleas
Begging for release
Deep the darkness breaks my heart

Ignorance is not bliss
No matter what it may seem
I wish to be in the crowd
Where I was forever looking in

This sucks. SUCKS. Blogger is having problems with the posting again. Grrr. Now everything sucks. You know when your life is mundane when you actually, ACTUALLY, prefer washing the dishes and vacuuming the floor to studying. My life is mundane right now. And I don't think I should be unleashed upon the unsuspecting world. I should be put away and chained for my own good (not because of the cleaning, mind you...). But for other complicated reasons. sigh. I'm never going to be happy with myself at this rate. Well. Well well, then.

I still haven't really revised. For some reason, I keep sleeping. I don't know if the rust in my brain has really been THAT expansive. Maybe it's the travelling back and forth from TP. I'm not sure. But I think it will go away soon enough.

I'm now going to whine about the house-cleaning again. Nobody ever does anything. ARRGH. My sec 4 sis does help out with the cooking and stuff since I come back home late and all and she is taking her "O" levels this year. I understand. But the rest? ah..ah..

AHCHOO.

Sorry 'bout that. I'm just allergic to BULLSHIT! haha. Learned that from I. Robot. Anyways, I don't believe that they can just ignore what is in front of their faces. I mean, they do some of the teeny weeny stuff. But only when asked. And only after a lot of pushing them. (Damn, I hate this keyboard. It jams up. Daymn it.) The big things they just take for granted since either our mother will do or I will. Cos' I feel guilty for leaving it like that. I'm particular to seeing certain stuff that needs to be cleaned. I might procrastinate. But eventually, soon, I will do it. They can just ignore the whole damn thing unless forcibly (emphasis: forcibly) reminded. They take it for granted that someone is going to pick up after them. Even if someone does pick up after me, I'll be horribly embarrassed. I'll feel guilty. I will always feel guilty if I am found to be doing something wrong. I can't not feel remorse. Even if I purposely want to be bad. Which kinda defeats the whole intent. Cos' then I can't be evil properly. Who wants to be evil anyways...

Which leads me back to my point.

ARRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHH!!!

I am sorely disappointed with myself. This life is killing me. Well, not killing. I stiil have it better than others. It's just that I expected myself to behave more better than what I am now. This whole poly thing is making me doubt myself. I have "people-envy". The masses at TP don't exactly boost a person's confidence. Everybody wants to be so different that that they all actually look the same. I mean, they try to be different...but in that difference they are all actually the same. Unless you are so radical that you shock everyone's socks off...Don't ask me what my logic is...If Joann can think that she's fat, I'mma freaking cow. If you disagree, I say you're wrong cos' seriously, she's thin and she doesn't even know it. Well, my mindset is warped. I need a mind-fixer.

And I keep obsessing more and more about "stuff". Daymn. The more I try not to, the more it invariably pops up. But I can usually beat it. I need to keep my hormones in check cos' I almost lost my composure and distance. Without thinking, I'll just do it. I need a leash. rowff. I also need to socialise with my class more. especially the girls. Cos frankly, I feel awkward with some of them. Like a loner. Or antisocial. Or something. The guys are okay. No need to worry so much cos' they don't care anyways. Well...I think I'm better at making people laugh. And I like it. I prefer people to laugh when they're with me. I don't care if I'm lame. (Glad I know that... :p). Cos' other than making people laugh, I'm at a loss.

I keep eating. And eating. And eating. It's like I can't stop. I feel so empty even after I ate. Full, at first. But later empty. Maybe I find that I have nothing else to comfort me. hehehe. Well, poly life isn't what I had expected it to be. Then again, maybe I had a too idealised concept of what poly life should be. I thought it would be carefree and fun. The fun part I kinda got right. It's the carefree one that I got wrong. It's still stressful. Most of the subjects are fine with me. Except Organic Chem. sigh. That one can die already. It's not that I don't want to learn. The lecturer explains it such that it is totally boring and un-understandable (I found many excuses for myself didn't I?...). Well, what can I say?

Well, today is Splurge Day. For those uninitiated, it's me and Joann's day for splurging on food. Yum. We save for a week, maybe we can just eat small, simple stuff and on Friday...SPLURGE it, baybeh! -(The word "baybeh" and all its registered trademark are under the copyright of Farah. lol.)- Last Friday, we ate at Burger King. Today, we were looking for a KFC at Tampines Mall on our 3-hour break. But we settled on Long John's instead. Mmm. It might not seem splurge-y to you, but to someone who saves for a whole week, that is like...heavenly. Orgasmic, if you follow Joann catch phrase. haha. But it was fun. It was like private girl time. Just the two of us and we talked about "stuff". Private, okay? :p.

Well, today was not really so exciting. Lectures the whole way. But we didn't have to go for the PIPC tutorial. Yay. But I think the Maths Stats was quite difficult for me cos' of the Logarithms. I didn't take A Maths so now I'm like blurr all the way. You will see my face turn to this *_*. haha.

Met up with Farah and Sharm to go back home. We decided to go to AI to collect our "O" level cert since we were released so early. Met Hong En there. You're beautiful...You're beautiful...You're beautiful, it's true...haha. Never fails to amuse. Previously met Yanni at Cheers and Jia Min on the way from Cheers. What are the odds, man? And we were just talking about not ever seeing them on campus that day. Coincidence?

Okay, I've been dying to say this for ages. On the way to AI, guess what I spotted in the compound of the Army Camp at Chong Pang? Guessed already? Whatever you're thinking, it's the wrong answer...Cos' I know you won't be able to guess this. A porn DVD cover!!! "Drunk on Cum." Eww. Half-naked ladies cavorting on the cover with its bright pink background would catch anyone's eyes. OMG! lol. And it's inside the fence so it must be from the army personnel...Just what have they been up to, man? Not serving the country, apparently. Unless you count procreation as a duty...

Minah Rep is so not my style. As I have discovered today. Jeans tight as sin, molding to your every curve (unfortunately). In tight jeans do thunder thighs not go. haha. I think my legs blood circulation got cut off and my legs looked like slim-wrapped drumsticks. uggh. I bet people would be vomiting already. *_*. bleh. Well, now I know what doesn't suit me. It's all about trial and error, baby. Well, I'll stick to the elegant and simple styles of EGA. Now, you're talking.

Today we started the second week. ahh. Second week. Today we had tutorials for the whole day. Biochem, Organic Chem, CSAS and then Maths Stats. All I can say is that all the tutorials were okay. We had to do a conversation scenario thing for CSAS and we got released 1 hr early from Maths Stats. Yeay!

But the most irritating thing came when I couldn't use my EZ-link card anymore. Turns out that it has expired, so today I had to use coins as bus fare...My money has all flown away. Already one bus ride is about 1 dollar. sigh. Heart pain. Especially since I live so far away from TP. One day, bus travel is $6 plus. A lot, right. ARRRRGH! Daymn you. Already my mother is going on about money. Again. About how I never got my EZ-link card. How it's my fault it never came in time. How it's my fault for this or that...this or that...this or that...and on and on...Yeah, yeah. It's all my fault right?

Ahhh. Keep seeing Rubayn and Wei Juan (I think that's his name...) at campus...OMG. What are the odds. I keep bumping into them almost everywhere. Still, I think they're cute...hehehe...Now you know. But I know they have girlfriends...

Today was frankly quite disappointing. Met up with Farah in the morning and took 168 to Tampines. Charted a new route today! hahaha. But it was about the same as taking 969. Then went for the HAP tutorial with the SexyLoh. Smexy baby. lol. Just kidding. But the tutorial was fun. We had kind of a game activity where we had to use our HAP knowledge. One, we had to pick a volunteer, put sticky tape on the person and label the correct body regions and parts. So funny the answers they came up with. "sexual organs". Fareed stuck a label down there. lol. Well, in the end, Group 4 won and got chocolate but everyone else dipped in the bag to take some. haha. But the most fun - or should I say disappointing, really, was that it only ended after 1 hour. Aww. So fast? So actually I travelled all the way to school for one hour, one measly (but fun) hour?