Wednesday, April 25, 2007 / 8:52 PM
Ugly Betty.
Words that I have dreaded to hear. As of today. Every Ugly Betty commercial reminded me of it again. Never has such an innocent and much loved show became a subject of hurt. You want to know why? Cos' I am the Ugly Betty. Don't take it wrong, I'm not against Ugly Betty and the magnificence of the inner beauty. It's just shocking to hear someone describe you that way. Ugly Betty is known to be a fashion disaster, nerdy-looking and quite clumsy. While I might agree on most of the points, it still irks me. Why, I should be flattered cos' Betty is a self-assured young woman who never gives up in the face of obstacles. She is genuinely her, as I like to say. Authentic. Forgive me if I sound like a CSAS tutorial because that is exactly where this whole thing started.
We were supposed to be doing a skit for CSAS and I got to be in a group with Yan Ling, Hafidz (the afro guy), Christina, Jia Hao, Clairmond and Joseph. I seemed to be doing the most input cos' nobody else seemed to be really thinking up the skit. Ideas, yes. Skit, no. We were doing a skit about "low self-esteem". I suggested something from Ugly Betty, explained a little. I got cast to be in the main lead. Cos' apparently, I look like Ugly Betty, someone said. my heart fell. Outside, I was animated, shrugged it off and was back to my crazy ways. But inside, I was heartbroken. I might be making too much of this but my self-esteem slipped down several notches. In one part, I was supposed to do a monologue - "Why am I so ugly? Why does everyone hate me? Why do they laugh at me?". I felt those very words. Those words in that moment were real. Very real to me. It doesn't help that I was already feeling like a weirdo (ookayy, self-conscious alright?) that day. I was wearing a very original outfit. Black short-sleeve tee with a black jumper skirt and black ankle-length leggings. Paired with egg-yellow Converse hi-tops. Really stands out in a crowd. You can see my shoes from a mile away. sheesh. Everyone else is wearing casual. sigh.
At least I'm not so bothered about it now. I seem to have lost some steam. I am proud that I am Ugly Betty. Cos' that means I have character. Yay for Ugly Betty! Take that! And that! *triumphant glee* At least, I'm a popular TV series. hahah. World domination is mine!...Wokay, that was waay too crazy. (I'm on a sugar rush...)
But there was some upside to the CSAS lesson. haha. This cracks me up every time I recall it. Alex, or rather Yi Liang was so funny. Acting like a besotted guy who was rejected by the crush and falling into a depression. lol. Acted so gay the whole class cracked up the whole time. But he looked more like a perv when he was in the corner. *shudders* So "teh". Good entertainment though but not macho, man. Not macho at all. No wonder the girl reject him. hmm...I must credit that the class skits were quite funny, everybody was up to the challenge. The first one was the most well-organised. The rest of us were fumblin through. But we couldn't care less cos' everyone was having fun laughing. The afro clown wig reminded everybody of Hafidz. lol.
This morning, I realised I forgot my Ez-link card only when I was at the MRT already. Wasted some time. Damn. Then I rushed home to get it. And then I took the bus to save me from further embarassment. haha. Not like yesterday. Yesterday I was like an hour early. Arrived at the interchange at 6:50. The class only started at 8:00. haha. So I toured around, got some drinks for later. Wasted some time, then went to TP. Still quite early. lol.
TP really changed me. Now I'm more daring and outspoken. If you knew me in secondary and primary school, I was quite reserved. Still a wonder to me how I changed. Maybe it's the air?
Words that I have dreaded to hear. As of today. Every Ugly Betty commercial reminded me of it again. Never has such an innocent and much loved show became a subject of hurt. You want to know why? Cos' I am the Ugly Betty. Don't take it wrong, I'm not against Ugly Betty and the magnificence of the inner beauty. It's just shocking to hear someone describe you that way. Ugly Betty is known to be a fashion disaster, nerdy-looking and quite clumsy. While I might agree on most of the points, it still irks me. Why, I should be flattered cos' Betty is a self-assured young woman who never gives up in the face of obstacles. She is genuinely her, as I like to say. Authentic. Forgive me if I sound like a CSAS tutorial because that is exactly where this whole thing started.
We were supposed to be doing a skit for CSAS and I got to be in a group with Yan Ling, Hafidz (the afro guy), Christina, Jia Hao, Clairmond and Joseph. I seemed to be doing the most input cos' nobody else seemed to be really thinking up the skit. Ideas, yes. Skit, no. We were doing a skit about "low self-esteem". I suggested something from Ugly Betty, explained a little. I got cast to be in the main lead. Cos' apparently, I look like Ugly Betty, someone said. my heart fell. Outside, I was animated, shrugged it off and was back to my crazy ways. But inside, I was heartbroken. I might be making too much of this but my self-esteem slipped down several notches. In one part, I was supposed to do a monologue - "Why am I so ugly? Why does everyone hate me? Why do they laugh at me?". I felt those very words. Those words in that moment were real. Very real to me. It doesn't help that I was already feeling like a weirdo (ookayy, self-conscious alright?) that day. I was wearing a very original outfit. Black short-sleeve tee with a black jumper skirt and black ankle-length leggings. Paired with egg-yellow Converse hi-tops. Really stands out in a crowd. You can see my shoes from a mile away. sheesh. Everyone else is wearing casual. sigh.
At least I'm not so bothered about it now. I seem to have lost some steam. I am proud that I am Ugly Betty. Cos' that means I have character. Yay for Ugly Betty! Take that! And that! *triumphant glee* At least, I'm a popular TV series. hahah. World domination is mine!...Wokay, that was waay too crazy. (I'm on a sugar rush...)
But there was some upside to the CSAS lesson. haha. This cracks me up every time I recall it. Alex, or rather Yi Liang was so funny. Acting like a besotted guy who was rejected by the crush and falling into a depression. lol. Acted so gay the whole class cracked up the whole time. But he looked more like a perv when he was in the corner. *shudders* So "teh". Good entertainment though but not macho, man. Not macho at all. No wonder the girl reject him. hmm...I must credit that the class skits were quite funny, everybody was up to the challenge. The first one was the most well-organised. The rest of us were fumblin through. But we couldn't care less cos' everyone was having fun laughing. The afro clown wig reminded everybody of Hafidz. lol.
This morning, I realised I forgot my Ez-link card only when I was at the MRT already. Wasted some time. Damn. Then I rushed home to get it. And then I took the bus to save me from further embarassment. haha. Not like yesterday. Yesterday I was like an hour early. Arrived at the interchange at 6:50. The class only started at 8:00. haha. So I toured around, got some drinks for later. Wasted some time, then went to TP. Still quite early. lol.
TP really changed me. Now I'm more daring and outspoken. If you knew me in secondary and primary school, I was quite reserved. Still a wonder to me how I changed. Maybe it's the air?
